Re: Getting together in Las Vegas, was Re: Antitrust

From: Adam Rifkin (adam@KnowNow.com)
Date: Wed Jan 03 2001 - 14:13:44 PST


In his FoRKpost

    http://www.xent.com/dec00/0442.html

Gordon wrote:
> Hey! I *do* have to work for a living and I love what I'm working on,
> but if it didn't leave time for any other goals, what's the point?

Man, do *not* tell your investors this. You have one goal: create more
value for your shareholders. Nothing else really comes close to
mattering until you no longer have shareholders.

> Methinks you need a nap, and probably a weekend trip to Vegas, lest
> you spontaneously combust. :)

Ok, had my nap, still cranky, time to flame someone. I could jump into
the brouhaha about Web services but frankly Mark Baker has been more
articulate in expressing what I was thinking than I probably could have
been. I remember a few years ago in the "Climbing Clueful Mountain"
posts that we sometimes get to the point in a discussion where not much
more can be contributed, so everyone needs to go back and reread what
was said and cogitate, and it seems to me that with the Web services
discussion that's where we are. The thread on Web services started here:

    http://www.xent.com/dec00/0321.html

But I just gotta flame someone. Sorry, Gordon, but you posted old bits:
> Wow, DSL firms all seem to be in a tailspin: Rhythms, Covad, Northpoint,
> Flashcom, Digital Broadband. And, in a last-minute entry for "PR gaffe
> of 2000", a Northpoint spokesman responding to customer service problems
> told the NYTimes last week:
> "We don't have time to comment on individual cases like these.
> Our highest executives are just struggling to keep the company
> alive, that is their most important objective at this point."

This was already posted by Linda on December 28:

   http:///www.xent.com/dec00/0274.html

So I'm gonna have to write you up... this time's just a warning... :)

[advertisement deleted]

                      STANDARDIZED FLAMING REPLY FORM

Dear:

  [ ] sir [ ] clueless one [ ] twit [ ] great man on campus
  [ ] madam [ ] dweeb [ ] newbie twerp [ ] comrade
  [ ] Elvis [ ] moon beam [ ] boor [ ] Obergruppenfuehrer
  [ ] citoyen [ ] Geek [X] p2p warrior [ ] TIBCO Employee

You are being gently flamed because:

  [ ] you continued a boring useless stupid thread
  [ ] you quoted someone's whole article just so you could agree
  [ ] you repeatedly initiated incoherent, flaky, and mindless threads
  [ ] you posted a piece riddled with profanities
  [ ] you advocated Net censorship
  [ ] you SCREAMED! (used all caps)
  [ ] you posted some sort of crap that doesn't belong in this group
  [X] you posted Old Bits (TM)
  [ ] you posted the inanely stupid 'Make Money Fast' article
  [ ] you run a munchkin campaign and we don't want to hear about it
  [ ] you made a bigoted statement(s)
  [ ] you repeatedly assumed unwarranted moral or intellectual superiority
  [ ] you are under the misapprehension that this group is your preserve
  [ ] you were unnecessarily mean/cruel/personal in your postings
  [ ] you repeatedly shown lack of humor
  [ ] you are apparently under compulsion to post to every thread
  [ ] you are posting an anonymous attack
  [ ] you don't know what you're talking about

I took exception to your recent _X_ post to ____FoRK@XeNT.CoM____________.
                                                  (newsgroup)
                                 ___ email

It was (check all that apply):

___ lame.
___ stupid.
_X_ from the Department of Redundancy Department.
___ much longer than any worthwhile thought of which you may be capabbe.

Your attention is drawn to the fact that:

_X_ what you posted/said has been done before.
    (Mark only if above checked)
    ___ Not only that, it was also done better the last time.
___ your post/letter was a pathetic imitation of ______________________.
                                                      (net.personality)
___ your post/mail originated on FidoNet.
___ your post/mail originated on Delphi.
___ your post/mail originated on AOL.
___ your post/mail originated on The Motley Fool.
___ your post referred to the community as a Board, BBoard, BBS, or Notesfile.
___ your post contained commercial advertising.
    THE FINE FOR THIS IS $20. Please remit immediately to:
            FoRK Network Security & Standards Patrol
            Care of Adam Rifkin
                    2730 Sand Hill Road, Suite 150
                    Menlo Park, CA 94025
    or your posting privileges will be cancelled.
___ your post/letter contained numerous spelling errors.
___ your post/letter contained multiple grammatical errors.
___ you are unfamiliar with the concept of the paragraph.
___ YOUR POST CONTAINED EXCESSIVE CAPITALIZATION AND/OR PUNCTUATION!!!!!
___ you posted a "newsgroup" message without Leader Kibo's permission.
___ you posted a "rmgroup" message without Bruce Becker's permission.
___ your post/letter was an obvious forgery.
    (Mark only if above checked)
    ___ It was done clumsily.
___ you have a lame login name.
___ your machine has a stupid name.
___ you quoted an article/letter in followup and added no new text.
___ you quoted an article/letter in followup and only added ___ lines of text.
___ you quoted an article in followup and only added the line "Me, too!!!"
___ you predicted the "Imminent Death of the Net[tm]".
___ you asked for replies via email because you "don't read this group".
___ you flamed someone who has been around far longer than you.
___ you flamed someone who is far more intelligent and witty than you.
___ your lines are 80 columns wide or wider.
___ you failed to check the "Followups-To:" line.
___ your .sig is longer than four lines.
    (Mark only if above checked)
    ___ And your newsreader truncated it.
___ your .sig is ridiculous because (check all that apply):
    ___ you listed ___ snail mail address(es).
        (Mark only if above checked)
        ___ you listed a nine-digit ZIP code.
    ___ you listed ___ phone numbers for people to use in prank calls.
    ___ you included a stupid disclaimer.
        (Mark only if above also)
         ___ your pathetic attempt at being witty in the disclaimer failed.
         (Mark only if above also)
             ___ Miserably.
    ___ you included:
        (Mark all that apply)
         ___ a stupid self-quote.
         ___ a stupid quote from a net.nobody.
         ___ a Rush Limbaugh quote.
         ___ a Dan Quayle joke.
         ___ a reference to Beavis & Butthead.
         ___ lame ASCII graphic(s) (Choose all that apply):
             ___ USS Enterprise
             ___ Australia
             ___ The Amiga logo
             ___ Company logo
                 (Mark only if above also)
                 ___ and you stated that you don't speak for your employer.
             ___ Bicycle
             ___ Bart Simpson

Furthermore:

___ You have greatly misunderstood the purpose of __FoRK_____________.
___ You have greatly misunderstood the purpose of the Net.
___ You are a loser.
___ You must have spent your entire life in a skinner box to be this clueless.
_X_ *plonk*
___ This has been pointed out to you before.
___ It is recommended that you:
    (Mark all that apply)
    ___ stick to FidoNet and come back when you've grown up.
    ___ find a volcano and throw yourself in.
    ___ get a gun and shoot yourself.
    ___ stop reading FoRK and get a life.
    ___ stop sending email and get a life.
    ___ consume excrement.
    ___ consume excrement and thus expire.

Thank you for the time you have taken to read this. Live n' Learn. Next time
it happens, though, we make you the mediator for Major-League Baseball.

----
Adam@KnowNow.Com

Will pay good money for hardcore JavaScript developers.



This archive was generated by hypermail 2b29 : Fri Apr 27 2001 - 23:17:55 PDT