| Punch Lines

CobraBoy (tbyars@earthlink.net)
Fri, 13 Sep 1996 20:42:50 -0700

| E | Punch Lines

Don't look now . . . but it's Friday the 13th. Says Hy Faber, "I
saw a guy this morning with a horseshoe, a four-leaf clover and a
rabbit's foot. I said, 'I don't think it's going to help, Mr.
Dole.' "

The publisher of the hit song "Soul Man" wants the Dole campaign
to quit using it as "Dole Man." * "Or maybe 'I Still Haven't Found
What I'm Looking For' . . . or 'This Old Man' . . . or 'Smoke Gets
in Your Eyes' . . . or 'The Impossible Dream.' " (Steve Tatham)
Adds Shep Shepherd, "I was talking with my father about same-sex
marriages. He said it was nothing new. . . . 'Your mother and I
have been having the same sex for 40 years.' "

O.J. says his kids are being robbed of the black experience by
living with their grandparents down in Orange County. Says
Hamilton, "He wants to move them home to Brentwood. That way the
black experience is only 10 miles away."

Astronomers say new research suggests that half of the stars may
have planets. Says Cutler, "The other half are calling their
agents demanding to know why they don't have their own planets."

A study says half of all adolescents don't get enough exercise.
Says Alan Ray, "The outlook is gloomy. If they continue their bad
habits, they'll grow up to be adults."

Reader Mary Weingart of Marina del Rey took her 4-year-old
grandson to a coffee shop for breakfast. He ordered pancakes and a
glass of chocolate milk with a straw. The cheerful waitress asked
him if he would like a booster seat. He thought for a moment, then
replied: "Well, that depends on how long the straw is."

Travis Smith, Electronic Editor
Los Angeles Times, travis.smith@latimes.com
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Better to fuck up, than to sell out...

-= tbyars@earthlink.net =-