The wife describes the Las Vegas leg of the world tour.

I Find Karma (
Fri, 17 Jul 1998 18:50:53 -0700

In the thread about life being a DOS

Greg wrote:
> If you think about the steps to actually communicate ideas
> to another person with the steps to actually communicate,
> collaborate, coordinate, and complete work between organizations,
> the steps are very similar. I also assert that just having
> the data isn't enough to accomplish work/communications/collaboration.
> I would like to see the WWW evolve from a data-sharing, data-centric,
> data-oriented infrastructure to something a little more proactive,
> reactive, assertive, task-oriented. Basically something that
> includes behavior that you (being the technical programmer,
> manager, non-technial end-user) can describe, share, visualize,
> distributed, dynamically change, and interconnect. Not just data.

and at the risk of sounding like a yes-man, I agree. The only problem
with having my cake and eating it too, though, is that it makes me fat.
And once I'm fat, I'm not nearly as fast as I once was. So I wonder if
including behaviors will significantly affect this future Web's performance.

On the other hand, behaviors will make it possible to do some really
cool things. Instead of passing around the artifact, "Diane and Mike
will do it for the first time on August 8," or passing around some
streaming data representing the video of them doing it, Diane and Mike
will actually be able to do it online on August 8. No, wait, that
metaphor doesn't quite work the way I intended.

How about, instead of me passing around a description of my marriage on
July 4, I'm actually able to get married online on July 4, and then pass
around pointers to that lifestream forever more. No, wait, that doesn't
work, either. Okay, I don't know what I mean, but I know I mean
*something*. Let me think about it some more instead of thinking about
what I'm supposed to be thinking about, as per Roy's suggestion in

Roy, your koan is very deep, actually:

> Life is a distributed object system. However, communication among
> humans is a distributed hypermedia system, where the mind's intellect,
> voice+gestures, eyes+ears, and imagination are all components.

If we take my marriage (please) as an example, marriage is the
interaction among several distributed objects that come together for one
or more ceremonies. But when we communicate that those interactions
will take place, or when we communicate during the actual ceremony,
we're just sending around media and pointers to media. Hmmm.

I need to think about this more.

Speaking of my marriage, my world tour dates have all been set now, I think:

Saturday, July 4, 1998 -- Las Vegas, Nevada ["Independence Day"]

Monday, September 7, 1998 -- Ridgefield, Connecticut ["Labor Day"]

Saturday, September 12, 1998 -- Floyd, Virginia ["Labor Day part deux"]

Saturday, October 10, 1998 -- Pasadena, California [Columbus Day
weekend; this is the one to which all FoRKers will be invited as
soon as I have more details...]

And then the honeymoon will be an and/or of:

February 1999 -- New Orleans, Louisiana [Mardi Gras]

March 1999 -- Maui, Hawaii [Michelle turns 30]

December 1999 -- South Park, Colorado [Adam turns 30; our 10-year anniv]

There's a lot to that point Greg made -- that "communication is a lot of
work." I'm in favor of anything that makes those communications more
palatable. After all, a world tour of marriages is a sort of workflow,
isn't it? (It certainly isn't any playflow... :)

I've been really lazy about writing up what happened two weeks ago -- I
wish I could just point to it or link to it, but instead I'll settle for
cutting and pasting it from a communication Michelle made to a friend of
Janie's named Richard... and end this post for now while I go back to

> From: Gardner,Michelle
> To: Rifkin,Adam
> Sent: Friday, July 17, 1998 6:01 PM
> Subject: July 4
> I thought you might wanna read what I wrote to Richard and forwarded
> to Darron about July 4. We are funny!
> -----Original Message-----
> From: Smith,Darron D
> To: Gardner,Michelle
> Sent: Friday, July 17, 1998 11:40 AM
> Subject: RE: Mawwige
> Wow, that sounds like it was a lot of fun, somewhat romantic and one
> of those 'you only live once' type of things all rolled up into one. I
> can't wait to see the pictures. Thank you for sending it. I wish I
> could've been a fly on the wall to watch all the laughter that I'm
> sure ensued.
> -----Original Message-----
> From: Gardner,Michelle
> Sent: Friday, July 17, 1998 11:14 AM
> To:
> Cc: Smith,Darron D
> Subject: RE: Mawwige
> Yes, it is true! We did it! It was going to be a real
> hassle to do the paperwork and stuff elsewhere, so we opted for Las
> Vegas where we didn't even have to show a picture ID!!!! Can you
> believe that???? And no, there were no ladders involved. We did it
> on July 4--independence day! This way, we will always have the day
> off from work on our anniversary, and always have fireworks and
> celebrations! Cool, huh?
> It was pretty fun! We figured that since we were doing the
> big ceremony thing in a couple of months that we would go for the
> complete opposite thing in Vegas! We had sometimes joked about the
> drive-through place there in Vegas so we decided that we had to go for
> it. We rented a limo for 3 hours (the driver looked just like Elvis
> on purpose--this wasn't requested, we just got lucky!) and had
> him take us through the drive through. Meanwhile, I could see the
> people inside who were waiting for a ceremony--they were all dressed
> up and stuff--and they were giving us the funniest looks. Of course,
> we were giving them the funniest looks too (lots of alcohol). It was
> actually very nice; we had the option of getting out of the car or
> staying in (we stayed in, it was really hot). And there wasn't anyone
> speaking through one of those funny sounding fast food microphones!
> They were nice people and this was the cheapest way to go, too---the
> paperwork part was $35 and the "priest" got a $25 "tip". Our limo
> driver (Sonny) was our witness. As they did they did the paperwork,
> they played the song "Unchained Melody" and declared that our song
> forever and ever. We had a very good time because we were having
> breakfast/lunch (pizza) and much champagne in the limo! And the
> driver was so nice. He sounded like Elvis as well so he was singing
> "Don't Be Cruel" for us! Very fun! We spent the rest of the weekend
> drinking and ordering room service and watching the fireworks from
> our Treasure Island suite and visiting M and M world...
> It doesn't feel too different since we've been together 9 years, but
> it's funny to hear Adam call me his wife and for me to call him
> husband! And he's wearing a ring! Too cute!!!!!
> Most people don't know about this happening, so the ceremony in
> Connecticut will go as planned. It's just a show anyway, you know?
> So yes, you still HAVE TO DRESS UP FOR IT!!!!! And don't worry, per
> your REQUEST, you won't have to do anything other than show up and
> have a good time with us!
> Looking forward to seeing you soon!
> Michelle
> -----Original Message-----
> From: []
> Sent: Thursday, July 09, 1998 5:55 PM
> To: Gardner, Michelle
> Subject: Mawwige
> So is it true? You eloped? Put a ladder to the window and
> snuck away from the house to run off and get married?
> Congratulations!! Now give me the scoop!! (and why don't you
> give me some candy too!) Was it romantic or corny? Do you feel
> different? Is it cool? Do we still have to dress up for the
> next ceremony? Were you surprised or did you know it was going
> to happen? Was Elvis at the ceremony? Come on, spill!
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Language is like a cracked kettle on which we beat out tunes for bears
to dance to, while all the time we long to move the stars to pity.
-- Gustave Flaubert, _Madame Bovary_