FUN: If Operating Systems Were Airlines...

Sally Khudairi (
Fri, 11 Dec 1998 12:30:16 -0500

MSDOS Airline: Everybody pushes the airplane until it glides, then they
jump on and let the plane coast until it hits the ground again, then
push again, jump on again and so on. Nobody admits to flying MSDOS
anymore although everybody does when they need to go somewhere obscure
that they haven't been to for a few years.__

OS/2 Airline: To board the plane, you have your ticket stamped ten
different times by standing in ten different lines. Then you fill out a
form showing where you want to sit and whether it should look and feel
like an ocean liner, a passenger train, or a bus. If you succeed in
getting on board the plane and the plane succeeds in getting off the
ground, you have a wonderful trip...except for the times when the rudder
and flaps get frozen in position, in which case you have time to say
your prayers and get yourself prepared before the crash.

Mac Airline: All the stewards, stewardesses, captains, baggage handlers,
and ticket agents look the same, act the same, and talk the same. Every
time you ask questions about details, you are told you don't need to
know, don't want to know, and everything will be done for you without
you having to know, so just shut up. Suddenly back in fashion because it
has a new fleet of swish looking airplanes that you keep seeing in
shampoo adverts.

Windows Airline: The airport terminal is nice and colourful, with
friendly stewards and stewardesses, easy access to the plane, an
uneventful takeoff...then the plane just hangs in the sky.

Unix Airline: Everyone brings one piece of the plane with them when they
come to the airport. They all go out on the runway and put the plane
together piece by piece, arguing constantly about what kind of plane
they're building.

Linux Airline: Far better constructed than the Unix airline and you can
fly for free, but only the highly courageous and aero-engineers use it,
because everyone believes that you cannot fly for free and so the
airplane will fall out of the sky as soon as it takes off. It never does
fall out of the sky, but all the rival airlines keep telling you that
one day it will.

NT Airline: Everyone marches out on the runway, says the password in
unison, and forms the outline of an airplane. Then they all sit down and
make a whooshing sound like they're flying.