From: Tom Whore (tomwhore@inetarena.com)
Date: Tue Nov 21 2000 - 14:10:47 PST
On Tue, 21 Nov 2000, Antoun Nabhan wrote:
--]
--]Seriously, though, it's a great idea and a sad commentary on the zeitgeist
--]at the same time. So many Dockers-clad boys taking jobs that uproot them
--]and destabilize them, all on the assumption that this will make them
--]happier than the slow-career alternative. But once you've made the money,
--]you have to give it all to Christie so she can buy you...a life.
--]
NT. BATHROOM - JACK'S CONDO - NIGHT Jack sits on the toilet, CORDLESS
PHONE to his ear, flips
through an IKEA catalog. There's a stack of old Playboy
magazines and other catalogs nearby. JACK (V.O.)
Like everyone else, I had become a
slave to the IKEA nesting instinct. JACK
(into phone)
Yes. I'd like to order the Erika
Pekkari slip covers.
Jack drops the open catalog on the
floor. MOVE IN ON CATALOG -- ON PHOTO of COFFEETABLE SET... JACK (V.O.)
If I saw something like clever coffee
table sin the shape of a yin and
yang, I had to have it. PAN TO PHOTO of ARMCHAIR... JACK
(V.O.)
Like the Johanneshov armchair in the
Strinne green stripe pattern...
INT. LIVING ROOM/DINING
AREA/KITCHEN The armchair APPEARS. PAN OVER next to armchair... JACK
(V.O.)
Or the Rislampa wire lamps of
environmentally-friendly unbleached
paper. The lamps APPEAR. PAN OVER to wall... JACK
(V.O.)
Even the Vild hall clock of
galvanized steel, resting on the
Klipsk shelving unit.
The clock APPEARS as the shelving
unit APPEARS on the wall. JACK (V.O.)
I would flip through catalogs and
wonder, "What kind of dining set
defines me as a person?" We used to
read pornography. Now it was the
Horchow Collection.
A dining room set APPEARS. Jack, the
cordless phone still
glued to his ear, walks INTO FRAME and continues. JACK
No, I don't want Cobalt. Oh, that
sounds nice. Apricot.
Jack opens a cabinet, takes out a
plate. JACK (V.O.)
I had it all. Even the glass dishes
with tiny bubbles and imperfections,
proof they were crafted by the
honest, simple, hard-working
indigenous peoples of wherever.
He rummages through the
refrigerator. It's practically
empty. Jack takes out a jar of mustard, opens it and uses
a butter knife to eat it.
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