statements they make on their drivers' behalf.
I have always wanted to own the Buick of sports cars.
I'm too bland for German cars.
I am impotent.
I could only afford three-fourths of a Hornet.
My father wouldn' t buy me a Camaro.
I enjoy putting out engine fires
I thought the 4000s was too fast.
I can put raw meat on the transmission hump and have a well done steak
the time I arrive anywhere.
Buick Park Avenue
I am older than 34 of the 50 states.
Buick Riviera Convertible
I'm not very smart, and I look like it too.
Hey, it's 30-year old technology. But it's GOOD 30-year old technology.
I like ugly, impractical, boring cars.
I am stupid enough to pay extra money for an uglified Chevrolet.
I am a very good Mary Kay salesman.
I am a pimp.
I enjoy beating up people.
I like seeing people's reactions when I tell them I have a 'Vette.
I'm in a mid-life crisis.
Chevrolet El Camino
I am leading a militia to overthrow the government.
Chrysler 5th Ave
Did the pushpins come free with the headliner?
I dig the rich Corinthian leather.
I have a kilo of cocaine in my wheel well.
Reliable is boring. My car is exciting.
I teach third grade special education and I voted for Eisenhower.
I delivered pizza for four years to get this car.
(See Dodge Dart)
I slow down to 85 in school zones.
Ford Crown Victoria
I enjoy having people slow to 55mph and change lanes when I pull up
I will start the 11th grade in the Fall.
I will start the 12th grade in the Fall.
Honda del Sol
I have always said, half a convertible is better than no convertible at
I have just graduated and have no credit.
I lack any originality and am basically a lemming.
I am a physician with 17 malpractice suits pending.
I do not give a rip about J.D. Power or his reports.
I am so rich I will pay 60K for a car that is in the shop 280 days per
I am fiercely independent, just like all my friends with Jeeps.
I learned nothing from the failure of Daihatsu.
Ever pay $2000 for a tune up? I do.
Lincoln Town Car
I live for bingo and covered dish suppers.
I will beat you up if you ask me for an autograph.
I do not fear being decapitated by an eighteen-wheeler.
I am dating a mechanic.
I don't know what it means either.
Mitsubishi Eclipse GST
Why accelerate? Because you can!
I have yet to complete my divorce proceedings.
I just stole this car and I'm going to make a fortune off the parts.
Peugeot 505 Diesel
I am on the EPA's Ten Most Wanted List.
I like driving an air-conditioned sofa that can carry your car in my
as a spare.
I sincerely enjoy doing the Macarena.
Pontiac Trans AM
I have a switchblade in my sock.
I am dating big haired women that otherwise would be inaccessible to
I think your car is ugly too.
Rolls Royce Silver Shadow
I think Pat Buchanan is a tad too liberal.
I have always wanted a Japanese car even more inferior than Isuzu.
I am an amateur mechanic who enjoys a challenge.
I am still in the closet.
I still watch Partridge Family reruns.
I am out of the closet.
VW Rabbit GTi
My mom won't let me buy a Porsche 'til I finish Algebra.
I stopped smoking pot when I got a real job after college. I swear.
I am tripping right now.
Volvo 740 Wagon
I am frightened of my wife.
Other drivers are unsafe. Let me go ahead and pull out in front of
guy to slow him down.
When spotted doing 140 mph on the 101, I have Ford Motor Company
Vehicle Team's 17" disc brakes and ABS to thank for allowing me to get
off the frwy and ditch the cop.
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