More Microsoft bashing - jokes about the kid.

I Find Karma (
Fri, 3 May 96 11:30:57 PDT

For the first time in, oh, a decade, I think, something from
Microsoft shipped on time: Jennifer Katharine Gates, weighed 8
pounds 6 ounces when she was downloaded, er, born on Friday at
6:11 p.m. PDT. Mother and daughter are home and doing fine.
Dad's probably at work yelling at the NT team for yet another delay.

I wonder when we can Download the update/bug fix patch!??!

Those six fingers and four toes aren't bugs, they're
features! And they'll fix 'em in the 2.0 version.

And what do Baby Gates and Daddy's products have in common?

1. Neither can stand on its own two feet without a LOT of third
party support.

2. Both barf all over themselves _regularly_.

3. In looking back at both we all would probably rather he
hadn't done that.

4. As they mature, we pray that they will be better than that which
preceeded them.

5. At first release they're relatively compact, but they seem to
grow and grow and grow with each passing year.

6. Although announced with great fanfare, pretty much anyone
could have produced one.

7. They arrive in shaky condition with inadequate documentation.

8. No matter what, it takes several months between the
announcement and the actual release.

9. Bill gets the credit, but someone else did most of the work.

10. For at least the next year, they'll suck.

11. Someone at Apple is the *real* father.

12. Now CEOs throughout the industry will be scrambling to have
kids of their own.

13. In a few years there will actually be someone named Gates who
understands the Internet.

14. Kid's actual name is "Microsoft Child for Windows".

15. Microsoft will soon claim it is the innovator and market
leader in giving birth to children.

16. Neither will be _that_ much better in '97.

17. For the foreseeable future, front end likely to be marginally
more attractive than back end.

18. New package based on very old and well-understood technology.

19. They don't show signs of clear focus.

20. Regardless of the problem, calling Microsoft Tech Support
won't help.

21. The initial aspects of the development process are unpleasant
to think about.

22. They're more attractive if you put them into a bundle.