Oracle + Apple?

I Find Karma (adam@cs.caltech.edu)
Mon, 31 Mar 97 02:35:17 PST


Forwarded from Educom...

> PEERING INTO FUTURE, ORACLE SIPS APPLE JUICE
> Oracle chief executive Larry Ellison said in an interview with the San
> Jose Mercury News that he is still thinking about buying Apple in
> order to "save" it, and has invited anyone with an opinion to send a
> message to savapple@us.oracle.com.

This email address seems to be screaming, "Tim Byars write to me! Tim
Byars write to me!"

> Many industry analysts doubt Ellison's sincerity, however, and say
> that if he were serious about buying Apple he wouldn't be talking
> about it publicly.

Does the word DUH mean anything to many industry analysts?

> Apple CEO Gilbert F. Amelio calls Ellison's idea "nonsense." (New
> York times 28 Mar 97)

Wait, Gil says it's "nonsense"? Isn't that ValleyBoy talk for "we're in
negotiations"?

> DOES NET PLAY ROLE IN CULT ACTIVITIES?

Duh. Of course it does.

> Although many Internet enthusiasts argue that the Internet isn't
> creating cults like Heaven's Gate, the group that committed mass
> suicide this past week in Southern California, others see a dark side
> to the Net.

Wait, why are cults the dark side? I thought the government was the
dark side...

> University of Oregon psychologist Ray Hayman says: "Much of the stuff
> you find is nonsense,

There's that word again. Nonsense == We're in negotiations.

> but because it comes off the computer it has the mark of being
> credible." Paul Saffo of the Institute for the Future says: "The Web
> is a compelling new medium being put to all kinds of uses, by
> everyone from banks to Cub Scouts to flying saucer cults.

Banks and Cub Scouts and Flying Saucer Cults are not that different from
each other, structurally.

> That said, it can also be a powerful amplifier." (New York Times 28
> Mar 97) But the Internet has large numbers of defenders, one of whom
> says: "I hate to watch news people talk about the Net. . . .

It's great entertainment.

> One `expert' on CNN mentioned that cults often recruit on the Net
> because -- and I quote --`technical people are often more gullible and
> more trusting.'

I found out today that the word gullible can be used as a verb.

> ... We get portrayed in a crappy light.. . .

Yeah, and that fast film doesn't do our profiles much justice, either.

> This time it's a cult. Usually, it's that we're all child
> pornographers." (Washington Post 29 Mar 97)

Next time, we'll be portrayed as politicians... or worse, friends of
Rohit Khare... :)

----
adam@cs.caltech.edu

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