DILBERT ZONE | List of the Day: Top 426 Best Small Businesses to Start From Your Cubicle

Wed, 27 Jun 2001 11:34:29 -0400

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Can you tell we only have 3 days left on this project (MPEG4
video/audio/bifs is fun, sort of)?
One of the team leads forwarded this to us:

He liked 17, I like 2:

TRUE: I started a consulting business the company computer, work
number, etc. Upper management heard about me from our competitor
and tried to hire me!
  -- Cubicle Pete-phone number seem familiar?

http://umweb2.unitedmedia.com/comics/dilbert/lotd/html/todays-lotd/lotd_1.html

sdw
-- 
sdw@lig.net  http://sdw.st
Stephen D. Williams
43392 Wayside Cir,Ashburn,VA 20147-4622 703-724-0118W 703-995-0407Fax 
Dec2000
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DILBERT ZONE | List of the Day

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Top =

		  426 Best Small Businesses to Start From Your Cubicle

=

VOTE PLACE TOTAL

VOTES
			 <=
b>ENTRY

(5 Points =3D Best)      

1 =
2 3 4 5

<=
input type=3D"RADIO" name=3D"Radio234788" value=3D"000005">

<=
b>1 1090 From here I can see=
 the whole parking lot. If they open an account with me, coworkers can ca=
ll me on their mobile phone and I'll guide them to the nearest free space=
=2E

-- =

			    So that's what the field glasses are for.

1 =
2 3 4 5

<=
input type=3D"RADIO" name=3D"Radio234191" value=3D"000005">

<=
b>2 945 TRUE: I started a co=
nsulting business the company computer, work number, etc.  Upper manageme=
nt heard about me from our competitor and tried to hire me!

-- =

			    Cubicle Pete-phone number seem familiar?

1 =
2 3 4 5

<=
input type=3D"RADIO" name=3D"Radio234262" value=3D"000005">

<=
b>3 923 TRUE: A guy at my ol=
d job had a small fridge in his cube and bought several 12-packs of soda.=
  He charged 10 cents less than the soda machine in the break room, and m=
ade a killing!

-- =

			    Former State Employee

1 =
2 3 4 5

<=
input type=3D"RADIO" name=3D"Radio234033" value=3D"000005">

<=
b>4 784 The cafeteria closes=
 at 4:00. Most people here work until 6 or 7. My cubicle-snack bar is a g=
oldmine!!

-- =

			    Mediocretes

1 =
2 3 4 5

<=
input type=3D"RADIO" name=3D"Radio233961" value=3D"000005">

<=
b>5 691 A sundries store, wh=
ich could sell munchies, $8 coffee concoctions, stress balls, spot remove=
r, black-market office supplies and assorted small arms!!

-- =

			    I'll-make-a-million-bert

1 =
2 3 4 5

<=
input type=3D"RADIO" name=3D"Radio233914" value=3D"000005">

<=
b>6 683 TRUE : Leaflet print=
ing, this guy at work used to design and print leaflets (500 at a time) f=
or the local takeaway in exchange for free food.

-- =

			    downtrodden programmer

1 =
2 3 4 5

<=
input type=3D"RADIO" name=3D"Radio235107" value=3D"000005">

<=
b>7 660 Charged co-workers $=
5 an hour to make sure their computer was running programs and tell PHB t=
hey were in the restroom.  Made $1850.00 first month--and I still get pai=
d salary.

-- =

			    Life is good.

1 =
2 3 4 5

<=
input type=3D"RADIO" name=3D"Radio236025" value=3D"000005">

<=
b>8 640 'I'm sorry!  This is=
 abuse.  Arguments is the next door down.'

-- =

			    Bilfurd

1 =
2 3 4 5

<=
input type=3D"RADIO" name=3D"Radio234586" value=3D"000005">

<=
b>9 634 I put a false wall i=
n my cubicle and charge rent by the hour for employees who need a power n=
ap.

-- =

			    That's not snoring, that's my screen saver...PLS

1 =
2 3 4 5

<=
input type=3D"RADIO" name=3D"Radio233912" value=3D"000005">

<=
b>10 597 When no one's looki=
ng I draw detailed plans of Star Trek ships and sell them on the net at $=
25 a pop.

-- =

			    Anxious in Avionics

1 =
2 3 4 5

<=
input type=3D"RADIO" name=3D"Radio234081" value=3D"000005">

<=
b>11 583 Already doing.  PHB=
 and rest of workers are 1000km away in another city.  Have phone, email =
diverted to my other job.  Getting paid two salaries, and looking for a t=
hird.

-- =

			    The wonders of Telnet

1 =
2 3 4 5

<=
input type=3D"RADIO" name=3D"Radio234326" value=3D"000005">

<=
b>12 565 Take a big business=
 and hand to our PHBs. Wait six months and voila - a business small enoug=
h to operate from a cubicle.

-- =

			    Skill-less in software

1 =
2 3 4 5

<=
input type=3D"RADIO" name=3D"Radio234013" value=3D"000005">

<=
b>13 498 I have developed an=
 underground railroad to free 'intelligent slaves' (non-induhvidual emplo=
yees) from this hell hole to heaven (high paying jobs with proper compani=
es)

-- =

			    Filing Clerk from Heck (Secret Head Hunter)

1 =
2 3 4 5

<=
input type=3D"RADIO" name=3D"Radio233919" value=3D"000005">

<=
b>14 484 The last time this =
topic came up, I seem to recall entries about day traders. When was the l=
ast time you heard about *those*?

-- =

			    ah, the nightmare that is nasdaq --beej

1 =
2 3 4 5

<=
input type=3D"RADIO" name=3D"Radio234916" value=3D"000005">

<=
b>15 470 'Smoking Area Acces=
s Passes' I work in a jail, and I control the doors in and out of the bui=
lding. He who controls the doors, controls the smokers. Heh, heh, heh.
-- =

			    Main Control-bert (who doesn't smoke)

1 =
2 3 4 5

<=
input type=3D"RADIO" name=3D"Radio234859" value=3D"000005">

<=
b>16 467 Cubicle decorations=
=2E  Put up interesting decorations that are hard to find.  When people a=
sk about it, say that you can get several more (at a markup).  Once every=
one in the office has one, replace it with another new fad item. They als=
o make great gifts.

-- =

			    Sadistic System Analyst

1 =
2 3 4 5

<=
input type=3D"RADIO" name=3D"Radio235236" value=3D"000005">

<=
b>17 443 True: Started a lim=
ited printing business from work. Had access to 'free' paper and brand ne=
w laser printer. Did invitations and programs for weddings.

-- =

			    Happily counting the profits.

1 =
2 3 4 5

<=
input type=3D"RADIO" name=3D"Radio234157" value=3D"000005">

<=
b>18 439 We were a medium si=
zed business.  From my cubicle, I made it smaller.

-- =

			    PHB

1 =
2 3 4 5

<=
input type=3D"RADIO" name=3D"Radio234030" value=3D"000005">

<=
b>19 425 Resume' service. (I=
 actually did this right before my last employer laid off most of us)
=

-- =

			    Mellow Yellow the Prozac Peon

1 =
2 3 4 5

<=
input type=3D"RADIO" name=3D"Radio235302" value=3D"000005">

<=
b>20 412 TRUE : COWorker spe=
nt 90% of his day selling Taps and Shower Accessories by phone and fobing=
 off his LAN support work. Then was annoyed when questioned over why 80% =
of the calls from his phone where long distance !!!

-- =

			    Aussie-bert

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