[FoRK] Re: yet another story about my kid

Corinna < corinna.schultz at gmail.com > on > Tue Mar 7 10:43:51 PST 2006

"Regina Schuman" <rschuman at jfcsjax.org> wrote in message
> at this juncture i'm gonna ask:  how many of you on this list were
> "difficult" teens?

Do I have to answer?  :)

Actually, I was a very reasonable, thoughtful, practical teen (making 
allowances for my level of experience and maturity, of course).  I was very 
concerned about my GPA and being first chair in band. I had no interest in 
driving or getting a job. I did academic contests in math and programming. I 
had a handful of friends.

Unfortunately my parents were strict (in the "rock music is of the devil", 
"boys are evil", you should wear dresses to church, kind of strict), and 
somewhat controlling, so there were some clashes as a result. I never felt 
like they were interested in knowing me (and I still don't, to be honest). 
My father, in particular, is quite irrational, and impossible to talk to. My 
mother is weak, and it's hard to really respect her. I think I have sympathy 
and perhaps some pity for her. I appreciate that she was a stay-at-home mom 
when I was younger, though.

We would argue about things like:
"How can you say Christian rock is evil? They're talking about all the same 
stuff we do in church!"
"Why do you say my friends are unreliable and irresponsible when you haven't 
even met them and have no interest in finding out who they are?"
"Don't ask me if I want to go shopping, if I don't even have a choice about 
it."
"Why does it matter what I wear to church? God doesn't care what I look 
like."

When I moved back down here 4 years ago (partially out of a foolish hope to 
have a relationship with my parents), my mother said something like how 
compared to my two sisters I seemed to be the most stable and successful (no 
anxiety, no divorces, no serious life problems, etc). I attribute that to 
being strong-willed, independent-minded, well-read, and the middle child. :)

I hope that the difficulty my son gives me is a precursor to similar 
traits...

-Corinna






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