[FoRK] And while I'm at it...
<jbone at place.org> on
Thu Mar 20 22:40:46 PDT 2008
I don't think I've mentioned how I feel about mules (the shoe) on men
for, oh, at least five years. Need I repeat myself?
But there's another pathological meme running around in the world of
men's footwear these days that bothers me even more. I don't know
what these shoes are called, but my brother-in-law who's been crashing
my obscenely large pad for about several months now --- I suppose I
don't mind, my wife tells me he's paying rent and we only cross paths
in the kitchen every couple of weeks, the place is big, dig? --- but I
digress... this pseudo-relative came to Austin from Dallas, and let
me tell you, has invaded my bubba-sexual Austin sphere of influence
with a serious invasion of Dallas-oblivious metro-s. Once every 4-6
weeks I run into him cruising out to invade downtown Austin smelling
like he fell into a factory of pimp and wearing, well, I don't know
what on his feet.
My beef with his shoes? Well, lemme just say these things look like
something he bought from the prop department when they decommissioned
I Dream of Jeanie. I mean, like, these things are about a yard long
and have toes that point straight up at the ceiling. I'd understand
if this were a true "cultural" difference, like, if he was a Sufi or
something. But no. These are high-dollar alligator-and-panda skinned
girly monstrosities that have probably been lined with the scrotii (?)
of baby seals. What the fuck, dude? When did *THIS* abomination
sweep through the ambiguously-gay GQ crowd?
Also, If anybody here got me a subscription to Men's Vogue for
Christmas, I appear to have misplaced the card or other record of who
you are. At first I thought this might be some kind of spec
complimentary issue or something when I got the first issue in
January, but I recently received my third issue. I'm not sure how you
sussed out my secret obsession with men's fashion, but - thank you!
Please let me know who you are so that I may respond in kind at the
next appropriate gift-giving opportunity.
Peace out, fuckers.
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