Re: Divorce: shared custody should be mandatory

From: Tom WSMF (
Date: Thu Feb 22 2001 - 15:59:23 PST

On Thu, 22 Feb 2001, Chuck Murcko wrote:

--] The best working arrangements I've seen involve the parents themselves
--]arranging the custody and/or support and telling the state to piss off,
--]effectively. Unfortunately, such rational behavior isn't so common, and
--]is not encouraged at all by the present system.

My wife and her ex have a great arrangment. By mutual consent she gets the
kid most of the time and he gets her every other weekend and for a few
chucks of time during the year. They both work out a schedule at the
begining of each year plotting birthdays, holdidays, vacations etc.

The kid is the real winner. She gets two sets of every holdiday, double
vacation trips and lots of infulences (me as her step dad and her step mom
who is vietnamise)All four of us get along really well. We actualy spend
time with each other for certian birthdays and holidays. The kid gets to
see us all together which not only shows her the situation of divorce does
not need to be messy and loveless but that she also cant play us against
each other. She tried that once and man did it ever back fire. Her dad and
I were on the phone comparing notes..dum dah dum dum. I am sort
of glad my dad and step dad never talked to each other, it made my schemes
a bit more easy to work:)-

My own mom and dad had a simlar arrangment but things got a little messy
when my mom moved us from NYC to fla for a few years. They worked it out

I think that by the time a court has to get involved in this sort of thing
its pretty much fucked already.

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