Mike Tyson

CobraBoy! (tbyars@earthlink.net)
Wed, 2 Jul 1997 11:17:27 -0800

Here are some headlines that ran in newspapers across the country.
For what its worth!

"A Bad Bite for Boxing" - The News & Observer of Raleigh
"Bite of the Century" - Arizona Republic
"Reality Bites" - Times Union of Albany, NY
"Tyson Subject of Biting Criticism" The Baltimore Sun
"Earmarks of cowardice" Houston Chronicle
"A two-bit bout: Holyfield Wins" Kansas City Star
"From Champ to Chomp" The Herald-Sun of Durham, NC
"Heavyweight Chomp" Philadelphia Inquirer
"Toss Tyson Out on Ear" Daily News, NY
"Ear Flap" Newsday
"Dracula" New York Post
"Lobe Blow for Boxing" The Tennessean
"Pay Per Chew" Philadelphia Daily News
"Ear-Responsible" Fort Worth Star- Telegram

The Top 15 New Problems for Mike Tyson

15> Fight controversy may adversely affect pro wrestling career.

14> Upcoming TV special with Martha Stewart in doubt.

13> That constant ringing in his mouth.

12> Spock vs. Tyson bout hastily cancelled.

11> Can't decide between the Crest & Tom's of Maine endorsement

10> Kids really start to freak out whenever he tries to play
"Got Your Nose."

9> New nickname of "Nipsy" less intimidating than "Iron Mike."

8> Has absolutely no idea how to handle his next opponent,
Vinny "No Ears" Bottatucci.

7> Nobel people called -- they want their peace prize back.

6> Saturday: Bite some guy's ear off. Sunday: Ozzy Osbourne
won't stop pestering you to go for a drink.

5> Willing opponents now down to Vincent Van Gogh and
J.Paul Getty, Jr.

4> Don King, fearing a loss of credibility, ups commission
from 98 to 99%

3> ASPCA has yet to approve match with Marmaduke.

2> He's starting to make O.J. look respectable.

and the Number 1 New Problem for Mike Tyson...

1> Recurring fantasies about Ross Perot and Prince Charles.>>


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