Re: Once again, what's a PASSLQ.

I Find Karma (
Mon, 16 Jun 97 04:56:35 PDT

> The Adameisterooski wrote:
> >[...] Safire said that "POSSLQ" was an offense to the 10%
> >of Americans who happen to be gay, so he suggested that the census
> >bureau use PASSLQ instead in a New York Times column.
> Harumph. That Safire bloke must be a militant species-ist.

Well, he did write speeches for Nixon.

> What about the 23% who prefer the company of a sexy hamster?

23% of what? Hamsters?

> I hereby petition the bureau to replace POSSLQ with AASSLQ: Animal of
> the Appropriate Sex Sharing Living Quarters.

Huh huh. Heh heh. He said AASSLQ.

> And there are those 18% of necrophiliac-americans whose civil rights
> must be defended. I mean, who are we to to judge those who happen to
> be turned on by a nice firm corpse?

You know, the terminally-inconvenienced never turned me on.

> I hereby cancel the previous motion and demand that the bureau replace
> POSSLQ with TASSLQ: Thing of the Appropriate Sex Sharing Living Quarters.

That's a helluva way to talk about the living-impaired.

> Darn, there are about 34% whose sex life involves non-gendered things,
> such as the Usenet hierarchy and a big pillow.

Rob, you need to come back from Europe, buddy.

> And 15% have no "living quarters" as such but have to survive on the
> street, under a bridge, wherever.

15% of the world is homeless? What are the other 85%, homely?

> I hereby waive the previous demand and order the bureau to replace
> POSSLQ with a noun sufficiently generic to offend no-one: "stuff".

As in, stuff it?

> PS: In answer to the question that started this, Myriam is indeed my
> SBSLQ now not just a g.f. (Sexy Babe Sharing Living Quarters).

Did I ever tell you the two ways to tell if someone's sexy? The first
way is, if they have really poor memory, they're sexy.

I wish I could remember the other way.

> PPS: Where did your 10% come from? If I recall correctly (always a
> doubtful proposition), in anonymized surveys roughly 97% of
> American men claim to be heterosexual, 1.5% homosexual and 1.5%
> bisexual.

10%? I made it up, estimating roughly (when compared with the
population) the number of characters in movies, television,
plays/musicals, dance numbers, and music, who are gay.

97% of American population claims to be hetero, eh? There's one
application of the 3% I don't want to be in... not that there's anything
wrong with it...


Dip me in honey and throw me to the lesbians!